1 Samuel 18:10 “An evil spirit from God came mightily upon Saul.”

Observation: Saul’s mental deterioration had already begun, as God had earlier lifted His anointing due to Saul’s rebellion and sin. Now, Saul’s destruction is set and certain.

Application: How little I understand the ways of God. I want desperately to think I can spend my life in a private party with God—a kind of intimate dance with Him that just goes on and on. Like the young child who complains at bedtime because of reluctance to end an evening of great fun, so I long constantly to be in fellowship with Him.

Certainly, I know that for His part, that is what He desires for His bride. Yet here I read that He is also a God who sends evil spirits. What kind of paradox is that? The fact is, Saul had sinned, and was doomed. Oh, his dance continued. Saul was not yet aware of his coming destruction. He had glimmers of awareness, but had not accepted the fullness of it. Saul reminds me of a massive ship, slipping silently and inexorably toward an iceberg. The watchman sees the coming doom, but the others on board are still oblivious. 

I do what I want; I go against God’s laws, and assume that because the music continues and the drinks still flow, all is well. But with each passing moment, the iceberg looms closer. 

God is looking for men and women with hearts that burn after Him, not for people whose hearts are focused primarily on the things of this world. He wants me to have ears that long for His music, rather than pursue the discordant music I can make myself. He is jealous to be my only dance partner as I go through life, yet I wander repeatedly to the punch bowl to see what other enticements life holds.

Prayer: Lord, how convicted I am of the tension in my heart. Part of me desperately wants to belong fully to you, but there’s this other part that’s not yet dead to sin. Make me fully alive to Christ. Cleanse me, Lord; purify me; cause me to turn from all pursuits that don’t glorify You, that I might have eyes only for You.